Sunday, December 6, 2009

Tree Auditions

Well, we auditioned Christmas trees yesterday. Wasn't sure our marriage was going to make it through it, but we did. And in good spirits by the end. See, my husband HATES putting the tree together. So 3 years ago he used his low down sneaky tactics and convinced me to buy a $20 Wal-Mart tree that had multi-colored lights on it. Charlie Brown would even be ashamed. And multi-color lights are NOT my thing. Yes, I'm sure they are just beautiful on your tree, on mine, NO. I don't like them. It's white all the way. I was 9 months preggers at the time and really didn't care what tree he had.

But then I got unpreggers and did care. So I have convinced him for the past 2 years to buy a real tree. That is always a treat. Taking him to pick them out in this freaking midwest December. GRUMPY! But at least we get a step up in the tree, and sometimes I get to put white lights on it.

But this year we haven't really been thinking about the tree, we've been a bit preoccupied with trying to sell the house, with him moving (today) and we kinda pushed it on the back burner. But yesterday afternoon we decided if a tree is getting put up we better do it ASAP. You know, we did buy ornaments, maybe we should get a tree to hang them on.

So the children get the sad little multi-light tree out of the garage and attempt to put it together. I attempt to help, and my husband, whom I KNOW does not want to buy a tree, looks at us trying our hardest to get these twigs to assemble something that St. Nick will recognize. He just shakes his head and tells me to stop. Even he sees it's hopeless.

And that's what starts our treck to the stores to buy a new prelit tree. (bahhh haaa haa ha) Have you ever seen a man's face when he is staring at a freaking tree that's going to be in his living room for 3 weeks and costs $200? It's priceless. So we head to another store, because surely, that store was trying to rip people off. (baaaa haaa haa ha) So when store number 2 creates the same dazed look on his face and his hand to clasp over his wallet, we went to option number 3, a real tree.

We get to our usual tree farm (AKA the Dogs 'n Suds parking lot) and it's my job to get out and find a tree because I'm the only one who thought to wear a coat in 30 degree weather. So by default the pressure lies on me. I get the tree, he get's it bagged and paid for and we get it home. (Bhhaaaaaa haaa haa ha) That was the UGLIEST tree on the face of the planet. We did everything, trimmed bushes, twirled it around, there was NO making that ugly duckling into a swan. It had no top, and no bottom, just a round middle. How I got such a horrible tree, I will never know, but it was worse than the Wal-Mart tree.

So 2 egg nogs and a few tears later, he sends me to Wal-Mart to buy a new tree. He sends me because now it's 6 pm and he is still needing to pack to move the next afternoon. So literally this was the ONLY day we could do the tree as a family. And with one very smooth trip to Wal-mart, I return with this bad a$$ tree that will make any Hobby Lobby jealous, and less than half the cost. Oh yeah!!!! So it only took 3 trees and several hours, but we gots our tree up. And if anyone wants a "middle" of a real tree, I got one for ya!


heidi said...

Awww! I'm glad ya'll got a good tree, though!!! Can't wait to see a pic of it. Speaking of piney pics - weren't you going to show us your prickly legs, yo?

M said...

LOL! Where is the picture???

I lost the white lights v. colored with the kids this year. I, too, prefer white.

Melissa said...

Oh you had one of those tree moments too huh? Glad you got it up and decorated...hope your hubby's doing well with the moving.

~~Mel~~ said...

I love my fake, prelit, white lights tree from walmart...but the boy fell on it the other night and it's just not the same anymore...ugh! lol.

Tinika said...

I woke up this morning to a half torn down tree, my cats managed to remove branches! I don't know how they do it.