I feel that I am trapped inside a I Love Lucy episode. And it's not the Vita-vita-vegamin one either. I could totally handle getting smashed on vitamin juice about now. That one I could live with.
And it's not the candy factory one either. I could go for a couple of dozen boxes of chocolates while I'm at it.
No, this is more the vase stuck on the head kind of episode. Starting off when my husband makes a FANTASTIC meal for me. (If you have followed me for any time or just take a gander at the hunk on my sidebar, you would know that my man does me right in the cooking department.) So last night he made salmon steaks, grilled zucchini squash, homemade blue cheese dressing... the works. So we are fixin' (yeah, I said fixin'..I'm from Texas) our plates and I asked him to cut a piece of corn on the cob in half. Yeah, he must have thought I said, "break a knife off the handle and have it slice your hand open because I really don't want to eat this fabulous meal." So 6 stitches, 2.5 hours and one tetanus shot later, we eat fast food.
I wake up to the grumpiest 2 year old ever and an overflowing toilet. As in, "MOOOOMMMM! The toilet water is coming out of the bathroom and it's coming our way!" Freakin' fantastic! Pee water all over my freshly cleaned bathroom and literally running down the hallway towards the kitchen.
Then I get to take grumpy butt with me to take my older one to zoo camp. Yeah, he throws his cup while screaming his head off & orange juice goes all over the carpet. Nice first impression. Other mothers, not so amused and the teacher just smiles and says, "Well, he's feisty this morning." Which we all know is code for, "get that little shit out of here before he destroys the entire room, but before you do, please fill out these 4 pgs. of paperwork."
So when we get home I discover that the little monster has a fever. Totally makes sense that he is having issues, but good grief!
And you wanna know the worst part? We are out of even our cheap beer!
I can only hope this episode ends with a, "Honey I'm home!" and everyone having a good laugh as the music cues.
Earning My Punishments
18 hours ago